And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
