I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
