the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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