The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Welp...herpes.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
