I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
