Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
i've created a new STD.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
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