So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I don't think brook has ever known best
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
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