Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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