yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
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