I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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