i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
