Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Randomize
