what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize