Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
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