belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
being pregnant is like rehab
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
