some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
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