Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize