Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
