I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Randomize
