I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I think my vagina is haunted
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
