glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
