dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
