You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Randomize
