We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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