When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
