Yo dont text me then not text me
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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