The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
