And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
