To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
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