yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
