I cockslap morals
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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