Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize