Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
