it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize