Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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