its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
