Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
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