grandma shit on top of the toilet
She announced her abortion via fbk
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize