dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
