we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize