this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
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