what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
