she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize
