I accidentally had phone sex last night
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
