We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
