I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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