is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
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