I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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