It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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