you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
