very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
