I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize